I'm supposed to be doing homework but I'd rather be doing something else that in no way benefits my attaining a degree. Boom.

I'm kind of freaking out. Just a little bit.

You see, I graduate in less than two months now. And then I get married six days later. Both things have been a long time coming (the marriage not so much--we've been together for a little over two years and engaged since July), but what is causing ein Bisschen anxiety is that I'm taking care of two major aspects in the entrance to the next stage of my life in one fell swoop. A college graduate and a wife. Not that I won't rock at both. Because I will. But I'm also a tad crazy so that can either help or be detrimental. Don't worry--he knows what he's getting into.

The idea of graduate school is...daunting. I wish time and again that I'd finished school on time, but no one can predict what life will bring them (joining the Marines, leaving the Marines, moving to help mom with brothers while mom's husband was in Iraq for...three tours?). I'm not making excuses--I had legitimate life events that prevented me from finishing school when I would have liked to. I've also not stopped working for more than a few weeks at a time since I was 17...so almost nine years now. Life gets in the way, you know?

So now that I should be doing either German homework or preparing for my midterms or working on my Capstone project, I'd rather be blogging and legitimizing my existence internet-ionally (I just coined that. Copyrighted as of now by me.). My upcoming Schule-freiheit is also spinning the creative cogs of my brain. There are so many things I want to do now that I'll be out of school. How about a list to keep me on track, eh?

• Re-finish and re-upholster the oak rocker I got at an estate sale in Cross Plains for $20 (bundled with an old quilt that needs repairs, a copper-coated aluminum cake carrier with a wooden handle, and an original View-Master [which is sadly no longer in my possession]).
• I'm actually glad I waited so long on this, because my tastes in wood-finish and fabrics has matured some in the past three years.
• Make a t-shirt quilt.
• Cheesy, I know, but a quick, fun project that will be peppered with memories and promises of future coziness.
• Paint a wickedly awesome painting for the living room a la Van Gogh.
• I can do this sh**.
• Finish the Christmas quilt I started four years ago. It only needs to be quilted and edged.
• Finish the embroidered Christmas stockings I started for myself and future DH.
• Plant and keep basil alive and protected from earwigs. 
• I love basil. I could eat it like lettuce. Plus purple basil looks awesome.
• Learn how to make a fondant-decorated cake.
• I have a feeling I'm going to be watching a lot of "Cake Boss" this summer.

Look at that. I have a good list, and now I'm hungry. And then I have class. And then I am off to Central Point to help the lovely Stefanie pack for her trip to visit her family. I'm actually really excited about this, because we're ordering pizza with what we want on it, not catering to silly men and their desire for only pepperoni. I've been promised tomatoes, olives, and artichoke. Do you know how long it's been since I've had artichoke on my pizza? Probably not since my mom and I lived in Texas, which was 4 years ago.

Hopefully I'll be on here again before I graduate!

The One Where I Introduce Brother 2

I love living with Manfriend, but oftentimes I do find myself missing living with my family, especially those days of my teen years in Germany when Brother 1 was between 5 and 8, and Brother 2 was 2 through 5 (Brother 2 is younger, and I assigned them chronological name-numbers based on the order in which they were born--see how I did that?). While I love Brother 1 and he had many a quote-worthy moment, Brother 2 was a plethora of awkward and vulgar utterances that are coming into Internet publication now because I feel, as wiser Older Sister, that he is old enough now to be a little embarrassed but more proud of the tongue that got him into quite a bit of trouble.

Brother 2 went to Babysitter's house during the day on base. Let it be known that Babysitter is a wonderful woman and loved Brother 2 almost like he was her own (I later found when I taught pre-K that I fell in love with the 4 year-old who always got into trouble, most likely due to the strong resemblance between him and Brother 2). So, rather than be too hard on him for his gems of vulgarity and lack of a verbal filter, she shared his most shining moments with Mother, who always took them very well (she had to--she was in uniform).

One day, little Ellie came to Babysitter's with some gnarly scratches on her face.

Babysitter: How did Ellie get those scratches?

Ellie's Dad: Oh, she grabbed the dog's private parts and he turned around and bit her.

(Brother 2 saunters over, hands on hips)

Brother 2: Ellie, was you trying to have SEX with a dog?

Like I said, a gem.

La Loca

Am I a big ol' nerd? Well, the immediate answer is 'yes,' but allow me to be more specific: I'm getting geared up for my and The One's wedding. It's not going to be a huge affair, but I keep reminding myself that running off to Hawaii with our families is pretty huge in and of itself. We've got our place booked, tickets purchased, and my dress all taken care of. We've even begun to take care of ourselves--I'm down by ten pounds in a month (no, I haven't watched "Shedding for the Wedding," nor do I want to). My mom even gave us the awesome Christmas gift of scuba lessons and certification, which is really exciting.

Why am I a nerd? Because I've already registered a new email address and blog site in my married name. Sure, the wedding's 3 1/2 months away, but I've known The One for 13 years now. Patience has never been one of my virtues, so I figure I'm allowed to be a little impatient when it comes to the fast-paced technological world. No, I'm not sharing their names. That was one of the stipulations in my being "allowed" to create them anyway. As the Germans say, "Pfft."

Besides, there are other things that make me way nerdier, but those are not the focus of this post. So I guess my question is: is this crazy, or is it okay so long as I don't advertise what the addresses are before the wedding? I've never been married before; I don't know these things. ;)

Can You Spare It?

Living so high

gives me nightmares of

 falling,

down

down

down,

and just before impact,

I don't wake up.

I lie there like a mutant,

absorbing my pain through my mouth,
like sucking the juice from a Sierra Lady.

Back at the dinner table,

elbows on bleached linen,

you're selecting a cut of

meat from the waiter's tray.

I figure my flesh is more to your taste,
so I lift my shirt and cut a sample from my ribs.

Crash Test Dummies

Wake up before you and hide the Golden books in the night stand,
wondering when exactly the Swiss
extract themselves from bed to turn the waterfalls back on.
Take me to the mountains in an elevator
and down a wooden slide requiring straddling, not sitting,
so we can lick the same salt as everyone else,
turned black with bacteria and dirty hand-oil;
why weren’t we afraid of diseases?

You’ll know where I am by my red bucket hat,
bobbing in the waves at a safe distance
between intermittent construction projects
requiring mainly sand and water,
with a splash of aesthetic spacing and height
and a touch of structural integrity know-how.
By the way, the Leaning Tower of Pizza is 1) not edible, and 2) did not have rails in the late eighties.

Step on a giant stick and it won’t stay stationary;
most likely it will jump up and gouge my leg,
but no matter—there are are bazillion ladybugs to catch in
little handines that pudgily encase them until they’re
deposited in a flat-red Ford Escort with squared edges.
Learn not to smear nasal excretions on walls, or
Miss Audrey will yell, “You know bedderendat!”
It’s okay though, she still loves me and I’m the only one
she calls her daughter,
and for a few years I’m black by day.

The middle of the toast is best, all juicy with butter.
I’ll eat the crusts to make you happy and
feel like a good mother.
Just promise me we can get ice cream sandwiches from 
the machine that only sells ice cream sandwiches 
so they’re sure not to run out.

Ich bin nicht tot!

It's been forever since I've done anything on here, and it's not because I'm dead. Because I'm not. Obviously.

This is my third term straight taking 16 credit hours and working (on average) 30 hours per week. The first term wasn't so bad, since I was completely gung-ho about returning to school, but the second was the cause to a slight crack in my sanity, and now in the third...let's just say that if I don't get a break soon, the little brothers in "The Wedding Singer" will be taunting me with, "Cuckoo's nest! Cuckoo's nest!"

I have a paper I need to rewrite this evening (yes, I've had it for a week, and yes, I'm waiting till the last minute and instead writing on here), but of course have all fare of other things that need to get done. Dinner, for instance. Food would be good. Kyle and I are trying our best to behave when it comes to healthy foods and healthy portions (a mess-load of pasta at 9:30 p.m. when I get home from work is not conducive to either energy levels or weight management). And there's laundry. Not to mention the general state of the house. We have a magnet at work that says, "A clean house represents an unfulfilled life" (or something to that extent). I think I need this magnet. But I would sure like the full life and a clean house. Oh, one of these days...when I only have work to worry about, rather than work and school.

I feel like I need some sort of outlet for all the things I want to say, and my busy schedule simply doesn't allow it right now. It also doesn't help that we're now Netflix-Wii addicts (Netflix movies streamed to your TV via the Wii) and Kyle's started watching "Lost" for the first time, and I feel like I have to experience it all over again with him. Ha.

I'd better get back to the kitchen! My man was kind enough to offer to run to Ray's and grab me a replacement Lambic for the one I dropped in the street while unloading groceries from my car. It was a very sad experience and one a lover of Lambic should never have to experience.

The better (because it's homemade) Lofthouse cookie

The One and I both share a sad affinity for those lofty, cakey, heavily frosted cookies that you find in a lot of grocery stores (typically Fred Meyer/Kroger/Tom Thumb--all the same company, of course) known as "Lofthouse" cookies. A few months ago, I began my search for a recipe for these sweetened pieces of heaven, since my addiction at $5 a carton (with only ten cookies) became more expensive than my annual purchase of Thin Mints from green and brown-clad little girls who bat their eyes and confidently tell (not ask) me that I need to buy some Girl Scout cookies.*

At any rate, I ended up at RecipeZaar.com (*edit: now Food.com), and found what seemed to be a promising copycat recipe. One problem: I thought I had all the ingredients until I looked in my flour canister and realized I only had about half what the recipe called for. Since it was too late to halve the recipe, I substituted white All-Purpose flour with wheat flour. They turned out okay, and while I found that they tasted better a day after you make them, the wheat wasn't doing it for Kyle or me, and I used store-bought frosting, which just wasn't the same either.

Yesterday I made them again, with a few tweaks. Plus I found a fail-safe frosting recipe (which most bakers probably know off the tops of their heads anyway), which I made a few minor changes to as well. The resulting cookies are in short, amazing. Here are my altered recipes, and I hope that everyone tries these cookies and reports back to me. Go!

The Better Lofthouse Cookie

Ingredients:

1. 1 cup butter
2. 2 cups sugar
3. 3 eggs
4. 1 tsp vanilla extract
5. 1 tsp almond extract
6. 1 tsp baking powder
7. 1 1/2 cups sour cream
   
8. 5-6 cups flour (until desired consistency for rolling)

Directions:

1. Cream together butter and sugar.
2. Beat in eggs, sour cream, vanilla extract, and almond extract.
3. Combine the baking powder and 5 cups of flour separate bowl than your mixing bowl.
   
4. Mix in dry ingredients slowly.
5. Cover and refrigerate 6-8 hours (or overnight).
6. Preheat oven to 400'.
7. Roll out dough to a 1/4 to 3/8 inch thickness using a generous amount of flour.
8. Cut out shapes and bake on an ungreased cookie sheet for 8-10 minutes.
9. Cool on wire rack.
10. Frost and decorate as desired.

And don't forget the frosting...



Lofthouse Cookie Frosting

Ingredients:

1. 4 cups confectioner's sugar
2. 1/2 cup plus 1 T butter
3. 5 tablespoons milk
4. 1 tsp almond extract (or vanilla, whichever you prefer)
5. food coloring and/or sprinkles (if desired)

Directions:

1. In a mixing bowl, cream together the confectioners' sugar and shortening until smooth.
2. Gradually mix in the milk and vanilla with an electric mixer until smooth and stiff, about 5 minutes.
3. Color with food coloring if desired.
4. Frost cookies (don't skimp on the frosting--Lofthouse cookies' creators are heavy-handed with the frosting).
5. Add sprinkles if desired.

Watch out! These cookies are addicting!















*Girl Scout cookies are really quite the best example of inflation. I remember when I was a Girl Scout and cookies were $2.50 per box. When did they rocket up to $5???